Saying Good Bye

My father passed away back in April and the family wanted the service and his remains buried on Father's Day which was this past Sunday.

I mentioned in my past blog about plans for a family reunion being shot to hell on the Saturday before in my last blog. The Reunion was to be held at my father's home but I think that due to problems with a niece and her friends shacked up in the house and issues revolving around the situation there, were the main reason for the cancellation of those plans.

We headed for UpState NY on Saturday morning. I had reserved a couple hotel rooms for my family. We arrived at the hotel around 2:00 in the afternoon and checked in. The hotel, an Econo Lodge was nothing like what they showed online. What a dive. The rooms smelled so bad of mold. Doors had missing trim, holes in the walls and outlets hanging out of holes by the wires. In our room the bathroom door had been busted in at one time and the door had a big broken section in the middle of it and the jamb was literally busted apart. The door catch section of the jamb was missing a piece about 16" in length and the door wouldn't stay closed. We went to my sisters house and returned later in the night to find that the hotel was actual being used by Mexicans. The place was operating like efficiency apartments and as many Mexicans that could squeeze into the rooms were utilizing the place.

My wife and I decided to go to an Italian bakery and to pick up some pastries and some fresh baked bread for my sister for dinner. We were in Albany NY and in the vicinity where my wife grew up. We headed out for a bakery in the phone book that my wife's family had frequently used. On the way there the front brakes on our Voyager decided to start grinding. Aaaargh. I didn't bring tools with me. Bad brakes made all the driving we had to do while we were up there rather difficult. I ended up changing the brakes and one rotor when we got back. The Italian Bakery, We walked into the place and it was nothing like it use to be. The entire area is no longer a good neighborhood. I don't know what went on in that place. They didn't sell pastries anymore. We retreated very quickly.

The dinner at my sisters house went very well. It was nice to see her, her kids, husband and mother inlaw. We had a nice dinner and conversation. Later talking with my sister and her husband I learned that my father had for many years, kept the remains of one of our Uncles in a card board box. He had left a request that our Uncle's remains be buried with him. I have talked with my sister almost every other day since my father died. My son was doing the grave side service. Not once did my sister ever mention anything about our Uncle. I was shocked.

Of course I have a way of taking things with a bit of humor. I figured a hole was being dug and it seemed that my family would take advantage and throw as many bodies (remains) as possible into it. I jokingly referred to the service as a twofer from that point on. We informed our son so that he could include my Uncle in the service. I'm glad he did because if he hadn't no one would have even known that his remains were being laid to rest too. I felt bad because my Aunt, the sister of both brothers being laid to rest was attending the service. She was taking it really hard.

My father's home is being used by a niece. A bad situation all the way around. I am glad I went with instinct and checked into a hotel. Bad hotel or not. If I hadn't I would probably be in jail now. A cousin had stayed there for a few nights. She went ballistic because of the partying going on there. Fighting over drugs and money. Drinking and driving. The shacking up between everyone. I guess  Friday night my niece and her boy friend went drunk driving to a bar after a fight with everyone, got into an accident with another car in the bar parking lot, the boyfriend was arrested for warrants and parole violations..... This wasn't my home.

My brother wants to move into the house. He will not do that with our niece there. She is in her 30's.  I have told the family that my brother should be there and the niece has to go. It's a situation that they are going to have to work out. I do not want my father's home used as a flop house. Bills and taxes need to be paid and that isn't being taken care of by the idiots that have tried to squat there.

I am glad to be home. Even if it is in New Jersey.